1. “Ice cream”
What it usually means: A delicious, frozen treat.
What it means to parents: An all powerful bribe that can be used to make your kids do something they don’t want to do.
What it means to parents: An all powerful bribe that can be used to make your kids do something they don’t want to do.
2. “Errands”
What it usually means: A quick trip to the supermarket, dry cleaners, or post office.
What it means to parents: A nightmare you pray you can get through without your kid throwing an epic tantrum.
What it means to parents: A nightmare you pray you can get through without your kid throwing an epic tantrum.
3. “Date night”
What it usually means: What you do on Friday night.
What it means to parents: What you do on Friday night…every other month after hiring a babysitter and writing out an extensive list of instructions.
What it means to parents: What you do on Friday night…every other month after hiring a babysitter and writing out an extensive list of instructions.
4. “Seduction”
What it usually means: Candles, soft music, flowers…
What it means to parents: Taking the baby so your partner can nap, cleaning out the high chair, showering…
What it means to parents: Taking the baby so your partner can nap, cleaning out the high chair, showering…
5. “Genie”
What it usually means: A magical spirit trapped in a bottle that grants wishes.
What it means to parents: A receptacle for diapers that, despite its promises, stinks up your whole house.
What it means to parents: A receptacle for diapers that, despite its promises, stinks up your whole house.
6. “Frozen”
What it usually means: When something is really, really cold.
What it means to parents: The movie with that song your kids WILL. NOT. STOP. SINGING.
What it means to parents: The movie with that song your kids WILL. NOT. STOP. SINGING.
7. “McDonald’s”
What it usually means: Where you get Big Macs, french fries, and other artery-clogging goodness.
What it means to parents: The place your kid catches a cold.
What it means to parents: The place your kid catches a cold.
8. “Baseball”
What it usually means: America’s pastime.
What it means to parents: An excuse for the parents of your kid’s teammates to act like complete psychopaths.
What it means to parents: An excuse for the parents of your kid’s teammates to act like complete psychopaths.
9. “Bedtime”
What it usually means: When you go to sleep.
What it means to parents: An elaborate routine that takes at least 20 minutes and includes supervising the brushing of teeth, reading a bedtime story, and telling your kid over and over to “Go to sleep!”
What it means to parents: An elaborate routine that takes at least 20 minutes and includes supervising the brushing of teeth, reading a bedtime story, and telling your kid over and over to “Go to sleep!”
10. “Computer problems”
What it usually means: Your computer has a virus.
What it means to parents: Your computer has peanut butter between the keys.
What it means to parents: Your computer has peanut butter between the keys.
No comments:
Post a Comment